Saturday, January 16, 2010

Ode to My Fatness

I was looking at pictures from last Christmas and Thanksgiving, right after I left Missouri. Holy cow, I hadn't realized how plump I had become. I thought I hid my weight well enough.
Note to self, never wear that sweater again. I must really love you guys because this picture is just embarrassing. I love that I'm standing weird in hopes to make my wobbly bits look less...noticeable.

Here is this Christmas:
Still busty but smaller than before

I went through all 250 pictures from Christmas and these two pictures are the only ones of just me. The rest are pictures of the nieces and nephew. This is the best you're gonna get right now. I'll have to ask someone to take a few pictures of me so you can tell I've lost the weight.

And just in case you're wondering, I started going to the gym in September and since then have been fairly serious about it. At freaking 6 o'dark in the morning I go and walk/run 2+ miles in the 30 minutes before I have to shower and get ready for work.

Thus far in the 4 months I have been doing this I have lost 30 lbs, dropped 3 pants sizes (almost to single digits again!), and have more energy during the day.

Reflections:
To my friends in MO, I feel terrible that you only got to know the Becka that was a sad, depressed chub of a girl. Since leaving MO and he-who-must-not-be-named, I have come almost back to who I was before. I am healthier spiritually, mentally, emotionally, and now physically. I am happier and loving my life again. My friend and I used to joke while playing foosball, "I hate my life" and I came to realize I wasn't joking. It had become my mantra. But I don't anymore. I have fantastic friends, a great support system that cradled me while I healed.

So thank you to everyone who told me I was strong, that let me vent and cry on their shoulder, who told me I was better off and that I'd get through this. Thank you for reminding me that my Savior knows me, that He can help me. Thank you for all the pep talks. I feel like I know myself better now than I ever have. I am determined and I am focused on what I want out of my life. I will not settle (especially for those who do not shower voluntarily).



PS - Posts to come include date night that wasn't exactly a date but more of a get-to-know-you evening plus Dinner Party! The ward put together groups of people to get together for dinner and I'm hosting since I have a huge dining room table and space. We're having tamale pie and enchiladas.

14 comments:

Tisha said...

You go! That is awesome about the gym and weight loss. Keep up the good work. All of us here in Missouri MISS you, but are so happy you are in a better place GEOGRAPHICALLY, Physically, emotionally and spiritually.

Chelsea said...

I told you how skinny you were! You are the Becka I first met when you interviewed me 5 years ago (oh my gosh, can you believe it was that long ago?) and you are SO full of life and vivacity now.

And since I knew the previous Becka and the previous-previous Becka and the current Becka, I'm feeling you've come full circle! I just wish we still saw each other and talked to each other every day :)

miss your skinny guts.

Katie Fish said...

Yay Becka! This post makes me so happy for you! You deserve all the happiness you are experiencing. And way to go on the weight loss!! You look fantastic!

Ellaniemae said...

Can I borrow some of your motivation?? I am jealous that I don't ahve it so much anymore... But you look a-mazing!! I am so happy for you!!

J and L said...

CW!!! You looked fantastic at Thanksgiving sista! And I don't just mean weight-wise. You were glowing again. :) It was like the old-school version of you with a contemporary flair. I loved it and loved seeing you so happy!
I also agree with Katie, this post also makes me so happy! Everyone deserves happiness, don't you think? Especially someone as wonderful as you!

Natalie said...

You're gorgeous Becka. I've always thought so :) And you do look amazing, by the way.

Laurel said...

That's a huge accomplishment and I'm so happy for you! You really do look amazing-- and so much happier!

bottoms family said...

Becka just so you know, I saw the real you and you know that I did! We shared many thoughts, laughs, ice cream and well scary hair highlighting nights. HA LOL! I was glad to be your friend, and you look great! U know I miss you tremendously, but I TRULY am glad that you found your "Old" self and are happier....I wish you were here with us, but I know that what you did was the right decision. I love you girl! But most of all I miss you~ U are so great don't EVER forget that~

Babbel Family said...

Good for you! You look and sound wonderful!!!

Stacey said...

I'm so happy for you! You look great and what's more important, is what you said, you feel great! It's been so long since we've seen eachother but I know that when we do, it will be just like old times! Thanks for an inspiring post! I love reading your blog because it's just you! Can't wait to hear about more of your adventures.

Sam and Brent said...

You look sooooo good! I think the best part about the pictures (besides the awesome weight loss) is that you can see a sparkle in your eye now. You are so strong and I'm so glad I know you! You look awesome!! Keep up the great work! :)

Jessica said...

I wish I knew the Happy Becka... I AM TOTALLY JOKING! I am just happy you are happy! But it would have been fun to get to know you better. You are awesome and always keep me laughing! :)

cej said...

Wow, the trials that we go through definitely make us stronger. Your strength is amazing. Your post left me in tears, tears of joy that you are doing amazing and of sadness that you had to experience such pain. Keep going on such a great course. Thank you for letting me be apart of it.

WrayLynn said...

Just so you know, I remarked to John Paul several times how truly beautiful you are (inside and out) when you were living here! You are an amazing person.

Woohoo for you for losing 30 lbs! That is a HARD thing to do. You look so much happier. I'm so glad you are doing better now.

WDW